CSI

Yesterday, Babycakes woke up screaming, just a half-hour into her afternoon nap. I waited to go in, just in case it was a mid-sleep holler, which happens upon occasion.

But the screaming just increased in volume and intensity, so I came in... only to discover a MASSIVE CRIME SCENE.

It involved multiple pandas, a hand-made blanket, her entire sheet, mattress pad, and of course, her ENTIRE BODY was covered in poooooop.

It was a serious fecal situation, and my immediate response was to create a to-do list:

(1) Bathe child
(2) Take PICTURES
(3) Histrionically clean up all of the poo.

And I'm SORRY that I have to share the photo of what her crib looked like, but it just seems so COMICAL to me. In my previous, pre-Babycakes life, I would never think that poo was funny, even if it was on the shoe of someone I did not like. But now? It's hysterical! And I did not arrange the pandas like this, they were like that when I got there. I had to immediately wash two of them, who had found themselves haplessly in the stream of massive poo-itis that occured in their mistress's crib.



The hand-made blanket was thrown in the wash, as was all of the bedding and clothing. They do not manufacture enough Oxy Clean in the world to satisfy me at moments such as these.

And is it mean to take a picture of one's child crying? I mean, there she is, calling out for comfort, and I'm snappin' away, like a heartless paparazzi. Well, yes it is mean, but when you are dealing with a CRIME SCENE, sometimes it makes sense to snap a few photos of the criminal herself.

(I will let it be known, for the record, that the crying photo was taken AFTER her bath, when she is poop-free, and I believe she was crying because I wouldn't let her suck on Panda. Because he was NOT poop-free, and, my friends, it seems he always shall remain a little poopy.)