The Begrudger

It's one thing for naysayers to begrudge me the blessings I have, but it's quite another when someone picks on Paul, the darling father of Charlie -- the child whom the world is rooting on as he takes his first steps.

Paul wrote a sweet entry about a messy day he spent with his son, and a commenter begrudged him: "You are very lucky to be able to complain about your child's messy ways."

I've had it with this crap!

Yes, we're ALL lucky compared to someone else, and the blogging community seems RIFE with people who like to point out that they are the "have-nots" and everyone else is the "haves."

Paul and Julie worked HARD to get to the point where they have a messy son, and let's let Paul ENJOY writing about how messy Charlie has become.

It's making me think of how far the begrudgement might go...

Me: Oh Christ, there are 10,000 maggots flowing out of the trash can! (true story)
Begrudger: You are lucky to HAVE a trash can, let alone complain about its contents.

Me: My whole shirt is covered in baby vomit!
Begrudger: At least you have a vomiting baby.

Paraplegic: I'm bummed I can't use my legs.
Quadraplegic Begrudger: Some of us can't use our arms either!

It's like some sick contest to determine who has the actual right to complain, and no one wins in the end.

See, just because one has been lucky in some way doesn't deny them the right to be upset, to complain, to be sad, or to have a bad day. If all of their negative feelings are invalidated by their LUCK, a person can become paralyzed and unable to verbalize and process their everyday disappointments, because they're afraid they'll get begrudged.

It's kind of a cousin of SNL's Debbie Downer -- the Begrudger. And, as I said, begrudge me all you want, but leave Paul alone.